I had a totally different post planned for today, but the hours creeped past me, which caused the planned post to be irrelevant. Instead, I thought we'd have some fun looking at television commercials that would never be allowed on the air today. Because banned television commercials are always relevant.
1. Winston Cigarettes
First of all, you are not allowed to even have television cigarette ads anymore. But could you imagine the uproar if a cigarette company tried using Dora the Explorer to shill their cancer sticks? Though at the same time, this was a prime time cartoon, like the Simpsons, but I know for sure it was mainly watched by families and kids. This has to be one of the most blatant marketing of cigarettes to children ever. I am sort of shocked it was even allowed then, but it was a different culture and a different time with a much more innocent view of cigarettes by the general public (the cigarette companies were still blood suckers that knew better).
Speaking of a different time with a different mindset, blatant racism was once a great source for humour and comedy. If something like this was aired by a major company today, there would be some massive human right lawsuits on their hands. But boy oh boy, I would love to try some of that glape flavour.
3. Mattel Tommy Burst
This is why I chuckle at people who pine for the old days when TV and media didn't market violence to kids. This toy would last about 10 seconds on the store shelves before parent groups would violently jump all over it and forced the toys to be pulled. Besides, no store would ever sell a toy at that price today.
4. Folger's Coffee
Yeah, I could totally see this exact scenario happening in my house. The only difference being that when Emily goes to see her friend, she is asking help to bury my body.
There is the issue that McDonald's has now promised to no longer market their product directly to kids on television (obviously, the kid's meals are still the most effective way to get kids to constantly beg for McDonald's). This isn't the main reason I would bet you'd never see this commercial aired on TV today. The fact Ronald McDonald is scarier than Leatherface, Dracula, Michael Myers and Cujo combined, would be the best reason. Giving kids weeks of nightmares isn't the best way to sell your family friendly product. Of course, you got to love how essentially it promotes kids to talk to strangers as long he is dressed as a scray clown and gives you shoddily made hamburgers.