My loyal readers, you have not received a post from me since November 25th. Many of you may have wondered where I am. Why has Chris neglected his blogging duties? Has he fallen off the face of the earth?
It is true. The rumours that I had fallen off of earth are not exaggerated. The reason that you have not received any communication from me has been because I have not been here. Of course, my fellow employees may argue that I have been into work for the last few weeks. There may even be some Guest Groups that can claim I have been here to host. It's not true. I have actually been drifting through space after a particularly nasty fall. Yes, a fall of off the face of the earth.
I never actually thought that it was possible. I just thought it was a cliche term for someone who has been absent with no known whereabouts. I didn't know that it was a very real hazard. Yet there I was, walking on the nice, clean snow not aware of the evil ice that was hiding beneath. I slipped. My feet flew up over my head. I was ready to collide with the unforgiving ground. Instead, I was drifting in space. I had fallen off of the earth and didn't know how to get back on.
You may be saying to yourself, 'Wait a second, there was no snow on the 26th of November! This is all a lie. He's just making an excuse for not blogging for a couple of weeks! Boo!'
First off, booing me is rather uncalled for. Do I really need that kind of jeering? Second of all, calling me a liar is a rather harsh claim. Third of all, I didn't type anything about snow. No, don't go back up there and check for yourself. Please don't reread this post. I didn't say a thing about snow. Trust me.
I said that I was up at the camp treehouse. It was a warm and sunny day. The weather was perfect for strolling through the camp. I was enjoying a tuna fish sandwhich while listening to the chirping of birds. Oh, the lovely memories this all conjures up for me. But then I heard some rustling in the bushes. So, being the curious person that I am, I decided to check out this rustling. That is when I saw him! It was a real life gnome! He had a big red hat and fat, curly shoes? Do Gnomes wear shoes? Uh. . . I mean, they sure do wear shoes because I saw one! So, I decided to chase him because if I caught him then he would show me where his pot of gold was. I work at Medeba, so I could really use some gold.
Gnomes don't hide gold? It's Leprechauns? Well, I meant rabbit. It was a rabbit that I was chasing. Because. . . uh, he stole my tuna sandwhich. He was such a jerky rabbit. He kept going on about being late for an important date. So, I followed him down his rabbit hole. . .
A rip off from Alice in Wonderland? I don't know any Alice and Canada's Wonderland is like 3 hours away from here. Do you really think I'd walk? Besides they don't admit rabbits into Wonderland. They only allow seeing eye dogs and some children into that theme park.
You're not buying this? Are you? Well, it's true. I fell off the face of the earth. And it was a nice trip.